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Narcissist Mind. 🤮

It’s funny to me how a narcissist hypocrite mind works. You know I’ve only shared bits of pieces for many reasons;

1. Being investigations, and some things are going to end up in court.
2. Being it’s hard to share some things because they are just.. well.. let’s just say when the truth is reviled, the ones she’s convinced I’m the liar will eat them words and I’ll still walk away.
3. My dads death lays right here. You will soon see truth to this. You can only fool so many.

But I can tell you this. The Narcissist mind is sick. It’s hypocritical & they are habitual & pathological  liar.

For many years I just wanted to protect what I was told I had to.. you know or I was going to Hell.. heck I still am apparently. But, I had to lie about things because of x,y,z.. or it was always my dads fault or it was always my moms fault.. pitted..

I tried speaking up once and was left in the same situation AFTER being in Savannah regional.
This is just my guess but knowing what I know now I can almost bet you, I am spot on. & when I can share more it will make more sense to you too.. but I was only “fault” for because bad I ended up in foster care with another family, the money got for me would have stopped. I figured this out after my son was born and I was asked if he could be  guardianship to them so they could collect a check for him under dads disability. My husband was LIVID! But you know now looking back, I see so much that I missed. Anyway..

The narc mind is sick. The lies that have been told and even listening to the recordings to get them all together has made me physically, mentally & emotionally SICK. I could never in my life imagine saying some of this crap to my son.. so when she tells you I’ve called her a “B-£*%” believe her. My dad called her that often too.. you want to hear it?? Because I can sure play it as well. And I don’t care if you agree or disagree with me.. if you heard even a 1/4 of life and what she’s allowed, I promise you’d think different too.. and you will hear!!!

I am sick of smelling the choline, that was stolen, because I was told I better not open my mouth. I’m tired of my children not even wanting to eat at a buffet because she steals so much food in her purse and has publicly EMBARRASSED them, even my dad hated going to eat with her, she always has to have zip lock bags and steal food.. that is one of the main reasons I don’t carry a purse!!!! But you know she has NO PROBLEM with the things she’s done to destroy us!!!! Even my children suffer from the crap she’s done yet she doesn’t even care!!!!! But you know she’s the big Christian who does no wrong.. let me just tell you.. I was taught by the best.. she taught me to change price tags and steal, the one time I did.. I got caught! And I’m glad I did.. because I am so glad I didn’t turn out like her... all these cute little sayings of “if I turned out like my mother” screw that!!!

.. matter of fact the very last time we went shopping together.. she price changed a tag at Marshall’s and I cringe even today when I walk in that store.. she’s damaged me & my children in more ways than she can imagine.. yet she puts on this perfect image of “such a godly person” 🤮

 So godly in fact, did you know god took my son from me to give to my dad because I was such a horrible person and kept my kids away from him when he got bad on drugs?? When he went on a drug exchange with my son with him WITH one of her friends??? Yea so who is this god that took my child from me??

You know then I was told to “kill myself” for exposing her because I was suppose to sit down and shut up... and not tell anyone the bad things that I hid or that had been said and done to me.. but because I did.. I’m a horrible person and she could live a better life if I were dead and not exposing the truth... hummm is that part of the reason my dad is dead??

Oh wait, no my bad.. I did kill him... I killed him and my child.. who am I kidding... you evil piece of trash scum, you got some kind of nerve to scream at me that I killed my dad and child!!! Sit as high as you want... your day will come.. maybe not here on earth but it will..but you are evil and A LOT OF PEOPLE KNOW IT!!! Sooo stay behind the masks... I know someone who will rip them masks off one day and you will come face to face with HIM!!!! Not sure when that day will be but IT will happen!!! And I can promise you attacking a grieving mother like you did there will be payback!!!! That’s why it says a child without a parent is an orphan, a spouse is a widow but there are NOOOOOOO DESCRIPTION FOR A PARENT who has lost a child and you best pray to whoever you pray to that it’s not one of your children that bring you to your knees Mr!!!!!!!!!!

Oh what a day..........Judgement day. 🙌🏼

Anyway... with the narc sick mind.. now I am being told my sons eye injury is my fault. Yup. Oh by the way.. SHE was not THERE. Hasn’t bothered to check on him, so I’m sure she’s gained pity over her “grandson” being in the hospital but she did the same thing with her DEAD grandchild too which she wasn’t there for.. anything for sympathy... anyway... Thursday night while my son was in the ER. I was told it was my fault. God is once again, punishing me for being rebellious & disrespectful. I’m wondering who this god is... I mean really?! Ok can we say “ generational curse “ from all the lying, stealing, sin etc. that’s posted in my other blog post?? But whatever. She’s still the holy one. Like my husband said when she said them things... he doesn’t want to be standing by her in a lighting storm!! It’s disgusting to me how she plays and when it’s all out and exposed well then what?? Her games will be over and she will “don’t know what you’re talking about” still?? Lord have mercy.

I’m glad I killed my dad, my child, I injured my sons eyes, I deserve everything I’m going through, while you sit with “you and god” (lower case god) and what he brings you to he will bring you through because you are so godly lying, stealing and all the other crap that you and me both know about... 😑 but it’s ok.. games are your thing.. always has been and lying is part of it. Just glad dads not here for you to use your man voice and play him into your web of lies, manipulation & deception..

The real you will be exposed! And failing lie detectors might  not work today!! ✌🏼

I found my voice! I’m ready to live in that card board box I was threatened with! Bring it!

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Well. It continues..

  & my son also. Thanks MOTHER. Yup I sure have. I seen him there (overdosed or drugged?) I have yet to figure out which yet because the person who birthed me “controlled his medicine” & her lies are thick. I am not sure she knows what truth is for anything. If it comes out her mouth it’s a lie, sadly she puts on such a show that she has some believe what comes out, but for the most part she is just tolerated and people “laugh in her face” “even her friends” hummm that is a statement I was told funny how them words were more fitting for her and the piece of shits mouth they came from.. in the near future you will see a picture of my dad in the last state I saw him in. It is disgusting. I’ve not had the strength to put it out yet because it’s horrible & so many will be shocked. Also recordings from my own dad & many others will also shock you.. but to me it’s a final piece  of where it’s all about to go & hopefully justice is served.. it’s hard knowing what is coming

February 5th 2023

 I know these are long posts- I am super broken right now, but, Yes I am ok. Sorry I’ve not got back to everyone.. I’ve been on self care mode all day today, cPTSD is real and is not easy to cope with.. & I’ve really beat myself up super bad today.. the feeling of not being enough is super hard to accept. Especially when I hoped for them so bad.. I definitely took steps backwards and relived a lot of trauma, nightmares & have been triggered hard from the past.. I allowed myself to be hurt again & I’ve literally cried all day long durning my awake times because I just don’t understand..  I’ve read some of my favorite books over again that really helped me cope with it all before.. I am weak and tired and my fibromyalgia is flared from the stress.. I will need a few days to recover from just knowing I let my guard down just to have a mom that I deserve.. and once again have to accept the hard truth that I will never have that mom.. to much damage has been caused and every tim