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Death of a Broken Heart.





Death of a broken heart is real. Ugh. ๐Ÿ’” 
I don’t wish this loss on anyone!! Not even the scum who told me I killed my son and added razor blades to my already destroyed heart & so much more hurt to the deep pain & brokenness I already feel... #RevengeisHis 

...I am seriously shocked some days my broken heart hasn’t stopped and most days I wonder if “this is the day” it will be finally give out and I’ll be with my baby boy again, my heart is so tired & honestly I am too... I have suffered the greatest loss there is & so much more has been added to it. #GodImissYouBlakey #SidneyBlake #Hughimonceforme #Mamamissesyou
#brokenHeart #Almost4Years 

Unless you’ve been here, you wouldn’t understand. It’s a pain you can’t describe and it doesn’t get easier, you can’t just “get over it” & Time really doesn’t help especially when it comes to child loss. This accurately describes the heart with child loss. #Broken #childloss #deathofaBrokenHeart #SidneyBlake #aSeaofTears







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This is part of the reason I share my story.

While this isn’t the full reason I share my story this is part of it. The last couple of years since my dad and son have passed I’ve learned so much, a lot of it hurts, but, even hearing about “who I am” from people who don’t even know me. Sad reality is this person could walk up to me right now and gut me and I’d have no idea who she even was... now even though I don’t owe anyone anything let me explain; there are only a FEW of these people; I am met daily with love, support, truth and people that truly know me and that have been there MY WHOLE LIFE that I would know if they walked up to me.. those are the ones who matter; but, since this person decided to attack me publicly on MY OWN POST.. I felt like I could elaborate a little on the “lies”.

This didn’t just start, I just masked it because that’s what we’ve always done. No matter what happen we hid it.. I am not hiding anymore and the more you learn the more you will know why! After dad died and the same lies were still being told…

You killed your child.

Edited to add: since I was asked; this happened at my mothers house while I was sitting in my van.

The biggest yet most painful lie I’ve ever been told and struggle daily just continuing to find a way to breathe after hearing it. I have already lived with anxiety because of you, while you walk around acting like some high class godly politician, but if this is high class, how godly people act and the way politicians speak to a mother whose child is dead I want no part in any of it, I will never recover from this you sick piece of scum!!!! You will face judgment for a lot of things but most definitely these words to a grieving mother who already has faced the most devastating heartbreak felt by the heart! I don’t care what seat you sit on in the political world, these words are so vile and your venom has deeply damaged every ounce of my shattered heart like a razor blade forced into my heart continuing to destroy every piece of flesh inside me, I know that brings you satisfaction just…

Lies.

This is how sick it is.. (the voice recordings)  True narcissistic.

My mom says I’m tormenting myself and my household.
Then she said she didn’t say I was evil.
 (The first video clearly states otherwise)
Then she said it’s not her voice and she doesn’t know what I’m talking about.
Ohh then she admits she said it.
Then it’s my fault. And I deserve it. Oh. And then she loves me.. ๐Ÿ˜‘


Yes I did call her to take care of some business and this is where it went. All my fault. As usual. Because I don’t give in to her!
All my life this is the way “god” has been used. Let’s go to the front of the church and be told sorry for the week of events and how loved I am. But. At least she admitted I did not kill my child in this conversation.
Do you need me to watch the end of times video where my head will be cut off or I’ll live in hell the rest of my days for not doing what you want and not getting on my knees ๐Ÿ™„ (part of my childhood!)
The end where she started to call me the the devil again. Yea…