My hope is gone. “Checkmate”


My hope to ever be loved like I deserve is gone. I will not beg you another day to love me. I will not wait another second for you to be who you should be. You have proved time and time again you’re not capable and as long as that low life scum is around, you will never love me or my children the way we deserve, especially with court looming from his “embarrassment” of the situation where he has made threats, bullied & lied and used his evil to destroy my family.. & I could go a step further but I won’t. You already know. You’ve played a hand in them lies, just like you did leading up to my dads death.. you’re good at your game.. and your “lies of love” well... my hope of them ever being real has faded, just like the promises you’ve made, the verbal agreements & the knowing of how things should be done at deaths of those who entrusted you... I’ll leave that right there.


The world paints a vivid picture of how things should be, while some just like the “concrete angel” hide behind a mask just trying to feel any validation or hope that maybe one day things will be different, unfortunately that day doesn’t come, not even in death, and all the times you sat down and shut up in hopes that protection of their image would some how be enough for them to finally love and accept you.. the longing of just knowing you were wanted and needed.. judge me all you want.. She will be the first “sympathy seeker” at my death and I hope someone finally puts her in her place for the damage she’s done! I’m not silent to her demands any longer.. I won’t take the demons to my grave like my daddy did! You don’t all know my story yet.. but I promise, after court you will & if I don’t make it to court.. my blog is set to pre dates, to post should I not live to share it, I change the date accordingly so that no one else goes through or suffers this crap alone, my hope was just to be truly loved and I give up on that now! #MyStory