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Not today.


I am a survivor!!
My truth does sound insane because mothers are suppose to be your best friend, the one you can count on to protect you & your children, love you unconditionally & so much more... not everyone has that mother. Mine would be happier learning of my death, especially now that I’m no longer an extension of her and under her manipulation!

Soooooooo....



Let me break this down: I’ve had (1) person tell me she’s the only mother I will ever have. Get her help & love her... Listen, you obviously don’t know my story. This is just a tip of it. But, a narcissistic person has to want help & clearly she does not, the  statistics show only 2% seek help; 2 percent. Well I can tell you she’s not in that 2 percent; Especially allowing;

◾️Her grandchildren to be THREATENED with a gun; AT HER HOUSE, WHILE SHE STANDS THERE & promised my children she would take care of it, take him to court, throw him under the bus and so many other empty promises.

▪️Her family to be threatened with bodybags, again while she stands there & even pulls him away from her family’s vehicle. More promises & lies that was only lip service.

◾️Her ONLY child to be bullied & told “you killed your dad & child” again while she stood there and watched me have a nervous breakdown, IN HER FRONT YARD. AGAIN more lip service.

◾️Stalked WITH a gun in his front seat, yet she went down and defended him, lied & then again MORE lies & lip service.

◾️ Sat with the POC local political figure in court against me. While you guessed it, more LIP SERVICE & still LYING to me, & even sat there while my mental health was attacked IN THE COURT ROOM.

Oh & there is even more, but, my blog, book, the news & court will shine light on more....
BTW: I have police reports & recorded memos of the events above. They can all be found within my blog...

Is this a mother to you??
Does this sound as if she wants help?

Sorry honey; you don’t have a clue, but everyone will! SOON, I have ripped the tape off of my face: don’t come at me with that’s the only mother you will ever have; I WOULD NEVER do this or allow this crap to be done to my children. EVERRRRRRR. {PERIOD!!!!}

Would you? I protected her far longer than I should have and it ended with 2 of my blood in the cold dirt, the cemetery in St Mary’s, holds 2 premature filled graves...

Clearly not all mothers were meant to be mothers. #narcissisticmothers were not meant to be mothers!!

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My daddy loved me.

  Life wasn’t always easy with dad, especially when he was so drugged up you couldn’t stand to be around him, he was either hateful & vile or so depressed he talked about wanting to die to be free of it all.. at the times he talked about wanting to die I had no idea how he could even say that when he had me & 2 beautiful grandchildren to live for, even a 3rd on the way & his last day before he died it laid in bed with a dry mouth and spoke death to be free… he even wrote a letter that he was never enough.. nothing he did or gave was enough.. I can’t even tell you the times he talked about suicide or went on drives not to even be found to be free from her mouth… accusing him of women after women… the hell, the arguments, the fights… the accusations… the drama, the lies… ughh…  Broken iPads, a woman beat in Walmart, my baby shower ruined, my husbands job ruined, my sons 4th of July baby race ruined.:. So much shit & here she sits… like she’s the victim who lost her husban

Well. It continues..

  & my son also. Thanks MOTHER. Yup I sure have. I seen him there (overdosed or drugged?) I have yet to figure out which yet because the person who birthed me “controlled his medicine” & her lies are thick. I am not sure she knows what truth is for anything. If it comes out her mouth it’s a lie, sadly she puts on such a show that she has some believe what comes out, but for the most part she is just tolerated and people “laugh in her face” “even her friends” hummm that is a statement I was told funny how them words were more fitting for her and the piece of shits mouth they came from.. in the near future you will see a picture of my dad in the last state I saw him in. It is disgusting. I’ve not had the strength to put it out yet because it’s horrible & so many will be shocked. Also recordings from my own dad & many others will also shock you.. but to me it’s a final piece  of where it’s all about to go & hopefully justice is served.. it’s hard knowing what is coming

It FINALLY happened.

(Recordings coming soon!!!) I am READY. I’ll be the “crazy one”… my body heart & health is exhausted carrying the abuse, hurt and trauma I’ve been living with.. hiding… covering up to “not hurt my mother” because she always made me cover up and lie about it!!!! Ughhh  It’s been a hell of a few days. Some big things are coming I have listened to more recordings than I even care to hear and completely disgusted that I even thought my mother would ever change.. hearing the hell I’ve been put through and reliving the horror of abuse plus reading my notes to piece it all for my book & the media including the sexual acts just to feed myself or meet at a hotel room and pretty much sell myself to have a bed to sleep in or as I lived in a friends empty apartment after she moved out, yet she kept it for me to live there because I was struggling.. I am just so upset that I ever hid the abuse thinking one day my “mother”? No my incubator / because a mother doesnt do this crap to their chil