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AmandaInColor YouTube


(https://youtube.com/channel/UCcY-vMMDFS_f3YBUzlZDWFw)


Y’all. I am finally making all the long awaited videos PUBLIC. As my heart & health has suffered I will be sharing more evil twisted trauma and abuse I’ve endured & reminding each and everyone of you: at my death DO NOT BELIEVE HER TEARS or sadness of losing her only child & her only daughter. She has truly shown over the years exactly who she is & it’s quite disgusting to me.. I couldn’t ever imagine putting my children through the hell, lies, abuse, manipulation & stress she has caused me and my family.. & even the death of my dad.. & son… but still claims to be so holy & has God on her side.. I am so thankful so many others are finally seeing behind her painted white fence.. sometimes I wondered how the devil fooled so many.. then I listen to her and I don’t wonder anymore.. && she still has the audacity to tell me she loves me!! I throw up in my mouth when I hear them words from her.. sadly.. she uses them often and has to get her way and cover her lies.. I can’t wait for that God she claims to be on her side to be standing face to face with her.. what a day that’s going to be.. and I don’t want to be near when that day comes!! 


Anyway here is the highlight of my YouTube channel and it will be updated a lot in the coming weeks: just remember should something happen to me before I finish.. you know where to look first.. even in a good ole boy political town…

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Just a girl trying to heal from the abuse she’s endured at the hands of her very own mother & her mothers friends.. 

While I’m now suffering from c-PTSD, depression, anxiety & a very badly broken heart since the death of my son and father.. less than 2 months apart.. being in intense therapy and now medicated from the trauma and abuse has allowed me to finally speak up in hopes that some younger version of me (or even my age or older) can recognize the signs and get away from the abuse before it’s to late.. hopefully saving their (dad) or mom.. before death, without being told to sit down & shut up, honor your mother, no one will believe you, along with the countless other lies and scare tactics used toward me.. even being threatened with body bags & being told I killed my dad and child.. & how sick and evil I am to break me… so much more to come and also a book is in the making! Exposing the abuse and evil because I choose to now “live in color”… 


AmandainColor.com



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Overdose Awareness: Dad.

I will be adding to this post & will remove this when I’m finished, so if you see this FYI know this blog post isn’t finished. Dad. I have no words. I could say a million things, yet, I hear the echoes of how your body was a “soup kitchen of drugs”, the lies of regimens, “I’m controlling his medication & blah blah blah, the lies. & all the times I tried to save you, but my voice, cries for help & pleas didn’t matter. Now that you’re gone life goes on for some, but for others like me & the boys, you can’t just be replaced, it doesn’t matter that drugs took you away from your only daughter & grandchildren.. I can’t just go find another dad. Although the more I learn the more I understand why death seemed easier than life. (SemiColon) Justice will come.. I don’t care what anyone says, I didn’t like who you were when you were drugged up, but you were always my daddy, you were there when the drugs didn’t keep you away and you sure as heck would not stand

My daddy loved me.

  Life wasn’t always easy with dad, especially when he was so drugged up you couldn’t stand to be around him, he was either hateful & vile or so depressed he talked about wanting to die to be free of it all.. at the times he talked about wanting to die I had no idea how he could even say that when he had me & 2 beautiful grandchildren to live for, even a 3rd on the way & his last day before he died it laid in bed with a dry mouth and spoke death to be free… he even wrote a letter that he was never enough.. nothing he did or gave was enough.. I can’t even tell you the times he talked about suicide or went on drives not to even be found to be free from her mouth… accusing him of women after women… the hell, the arguments, the fights… the accusations… the drama, the lies… ughh…  Broken iPads, a woman beat in Walmart, my baby shower ruined, my husbands job ruined, my sons 4th of July baby race ruined.:. So much shit & here she sits… like she’s the victim who lost her husban

Overdue. RIP daddy.

(It’s late & this was a very hard post for me! I will be editing this with some voice recordings, court documents, police reports & more in the very near future so please check back for more details soon!!) to my daddy… thanks for loving me hard when you were in sound mind..without the drugs & I’m sorry I didn’t see through the lies that left so many unanswered questions… at your death. I’m one day closer to seeing you!”) ……….  So after today’s appointment I feel like I need to write this post. As many or probably all of you know at this point my dad is dead. Above you will see the final picture of him on earth. Without life. Laying in his casket. Prematurely. What comes next is a mystery that unfortunately I’m not sure will ever get solved although I still have hope that someday before I take my last breath here I will have the answers I’ve been seeking.. Unfortunately I don’t know for certain if his overdose or as I was told “his body was a drug soup kitchen” was intentio