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But that’s your daughter!

 My best friend Kelly sent this to me today: it is SPOT ON! Thank you Kelly for this reminder.. I love you! 💕 

•For all my sisters out there who hear “but she’s your mother” .. this is for you! YOU ARE BREAKING CURSES!

- For the ones who don’t know what walking in the shoes feels like.. or know the trauma a mother is capable of.. read this! We were not out here to be abused by our mothers and accept it! I don’t care if we only get one mother.. she doesn’t have the right to destroy us.. just because she birthed us! PLEASE READ THIS! 


“But that’s your daughter!”

Why are these words never spoken?

Why is it that when adult child estrangement happens, in almost any scenario, (and no matter how wrong they are), mothers are comforted with phrases like, “Oh, I’m so sorry. You must be heart broken. I can’t believe she’s treating you this way!”

Then, they turn to us when we pour our broken hearts out and murmur things like, 

“But she’s your mother”

“But you only get one mom.”

(Yes [insert name], I am painfully aware that I only had one, and all she gave me was poor mental health and a twisted sense of humor). 


It is never the daughters job to carry the mother’s mistakes, shame, abuse, or healing. I don’t understand how the general public could get this so backwards. 

Look at the daughter. The daughter who is breaking generational curses. The daughter who is pushing forward despite being forced to orphan herself. The daughter who has been hurt so many times that she finally had to run away and put a padlock on her heart. 

I want you to take a long hard look at her before you dump added shame onto her already wrecked heart.. and before you open your mouth- pause and consider that her decision to set these boundaries just might actually be for protection, not punishment. 

Then I want you to turn and ask the mother- 

“But she was your daughter, how could you treat her that way?”

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